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Today's lighthearted relief...add yours as necessary.


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Sadly not my joke....... My wife asked me why I was whispering in the house. "Because Mark Zuckerberg's listening," I whispered. She laughed.  Alexa laughed. Siri laughed. 

Twitter asks what I'm doing. Facebook asks what I'm thinking. Google asks where I am. The internet has turned into my mother.     🕵️‍♀️ 

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On 9/6/2020 at 11:15 AM, Joe Tauser said:

didn't see the Pole Warning Cone

Yep, same as those people who don't see the big sign in Fire Engine Red that says "Do Not Turn This OFF Under Any Circumstances", which is above/over/in front of  that crucial switch that we all have found in the wrong position in our work travels.    🚫 🔌

cheers, Aus

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A number of lawyers were sitting around the office playing poker.

"I win!" said Harold.

George threw down his cards.  "That's it, I've had it with your cheating, Harold!"

Roger chimed in with  "That's a terrible accusation George.  What evidence have you got to support that slanderous claim?"

"Because they're not the cards I dealt him!"   🤑

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A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons.

The Stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger".....

 

 

There was a person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.

No pun in ten did.....

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A woman is visiting her husband who is in prison.

As she is leaving, she tells the prison guard;

"You need to stop working my husband so hard, he is exhausted"

The prison guard laughed and said;

"Ha, your husband does nothing but eat, sleep and stay in his cell"

The wife says;

"Well that's odd, he tells me he's been digging a tunnel for months...."

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